Whether you have been married for five years or 15, you have three kids no kids, or you own significant assets or no assets as a couple, the decision to divorce is never a light one to make. Before you and your spouse decide to legally end your union, you should decide if your marriage is salvageable or if divorce is the best option. Psychology Today details six signs your California marriage is truly over.
According to the report, the inability to resolve differences without causing harm to the relationship causes couples to avoid conflict and disagreement altogether. Avoiding conflict does not make a marriage stronger. Rather, it usually results in one party bullying the other into submission, which further results in increased distance, loss of respect and gradual withdrawal from the relationship. If you and your spouse have reached this point, your marriage may be near its end.
Another sign you and your spouse are ready for divorce is one or both of you are emotionally disengaged. Emotional commitment is a minimum requisite for the development and preservation of affection and without it, you and your spouse may discover you have a difficult time sustaining an intimate relationship. Disengagement often leads to disaffection, which is the precursor for actual dislike.
A third sign you and your spouse are ready for divorce is lack of physical intimacy. Sex both communicates and reinforces an emotional connection. If it has been a while since you and your spouse have had sex, it is not only a sign that emotional disengagement is steadily advancing but also, that you and your partner take no pleasure in each other.
A fourth sign you are ready for divorce is an increased focus on aspects outside of your marriage. Some unhappy individuals compensate for the lack of intimacy in their marriage by pouring themselves into their children's lives while others become workaholics. When individuals begin to seek satisfaction outside of their marriage, the probability of an affair increases.
A final sign your marriage is over is planning on yours, your spouse's or your part for the single life. If you or your spouse are suddenly inspired to lose weight, get in shape or boost your appearance for reasons other than your own personal satisfaction or to impress your significant other, it may be a sign you are ready to move on. Also, if you or your spouse has always been a stay-at-home parent but have recently shown interest in acquiring or renewing a career, it may be a sign you or your spouse wants to be more independent of the other.
This post is for informational purposes only. It should not be used as legal advice.